Man says his friends always expect him to pay for their meals because he earns “4-5x more” than them

SINGAPORE: A man who earns four to five times more than his friends took to social media to ask Singaporeans, “Do you expect your higher-earning friends to pay for your meals?”

In his post, he explained what prompted him to ask this question, stating that whenever they dined outside, and he offered to take the group’s bills first, none of his friends “would even ask how much to transfer back unless he chased him for it.”

He said, “Some would even joke and ask if it really matters to me because it’s such a ‘small’ amount (it’s not) and/or to treat them cos ‘I earn so much more’.

Like most of the time, I really have no problem treating my loved ones but if you’re acting like you’re entitled to it, it just leaves a sour taste in my mouth.”

“Me and my friends pay and treat one another regardless of our income”

In the comments section, Singaporean Redditors expressed frustration with the man’s friends, saying they were not true friends but rather “human leeches” who took advantage of his generosity.

One Redditor bluntly said, “If they are leeches, do you want them to be around? Me and my friends pay and treat one another regardless of our income. We have our own dignity, and we view one another as equals, a key part of our friendship.

While another commented, “It’s frustrating when generosity is taken for granted. Your earnings shouldn’t determine whether you foot the bill every time. Mutual respect and consideration should guide how expenses are shared among friends.”

Others, meanwhile, admitted to occasionally requesting their “wealthier friends” to cover small expenses like coffee, viewing it as a friendly gesture.

However, they drew the line at expecting their “wealthier friends” to foot the bill for restaurant meals, recognizing that such expectations would be unfair and entitled. 

They also gave the man some helpful advice on handling the situation, such as keeping a simple record in Excel to track what his friends owe him and gently reminding them or using an app like Splitwise to split expenses more smoothly at their next get-together.

One Redditor added, “Don’t need to be shy about asking for money. Everyone can see who owes who how much. Also great for splitting expenses on overseas trips.”

Moreover, a few Redditors shared their experiences with friends who never paid them back.

One recounted a past experience with an entitled friend, stating, “He used to complain to me that one of his friends earned so much more and yet did not pay for his meal.

Every time I dine with him, he will always ask me to pay first. I feel like he’s afraid that I may not pay him back because he still owes me money from many years ago.

These kind are leechers, not friends. I ended the friendship with him so you should do it too.”

Another shared a similar sentiment, saying:

“I get that a lot too. I wouldn’t mind treating them once in awhile, but if they’re expecting me to pay just because I earn more, I told them they should quit their jobs and just wait for me to pay for everything since I earn more. Lol.

They stopped expecting after that. But for those ‘friends’ who felt I was condescending by saying this, I stopped meeting them. Good riddance.”

Read also: My friend treats me like I’m his ATM machine: ‘How do I force him to return my money?’