Singaporean woman asks if it’s a red flag for a man in his 20s or 30s to not know how to cook and clean

SINGAPORE: A local Reddit user is puzzled as to why some adults in Singapore don’t know basic household skills, including chores such as doing one’s own laundry.

In a post on r/askSingapore on Sunday (Jun 29), u/kittyprincessxX wrote that she understands that it’s common for Singaporeans to live with their parents until marriage and that many households have domestic helpers. While this “makes sense with how things are here,” it does not exactly contribute to people learning the basic skills.

The post author added that she has met both men and women in their late 20s and 30s who lack cooking and cleaning skills, and some don’t even know how to do laundry.

“Some still rely on their parents for meals or just eat out all the time,” she wrote, asking if this is “really that common.”

“And how do they manage when they move out or start living with a partner? Do they eventually pick these things up, or do they just expect their partner to handle it?” u/kittyprincessxX added, saying she is “genuinely curious” and is “not trying to judge.”

As a woman, she also wants to know if it’s a red flag when a man in his late 20s or 30s does not know how to cook or clean.

The top comment on her post was from someone who said that it “definitely” isn’t a red flag in itself for a man this age not to know how to cook or clean, since these skills can be learned.

However, “if they don’t want to learn, that’s a red flag,” the commenter warned.

They also explained the lack of basic adult skills among some Singaporeans this way: “A lot of helicopter parents who want to make their kids’ lives easier or control freaks who insist there’s only one way of doing things and refuse to let their children do anything their way, which results in them just not doing it eventually.”

Others disagreed, however, saying that it is a red flag when a man does not have these basic adult skills.

“Definitely a red flag because someone in their late 20s or 30s has clearly demonstrated no desire to learn these skills for over a decade of adulthood,” said one.

“It takes a few minutes to learn how to operate a washing machine and dryer. If someone still doesn’t know how to do laundry in their 30s — yes, it’s definitely a red flag. You don’t have to be a master chef either, but at least learn how to fry an egg or operate a microwave — even children can figure this out.” /TISG

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